No Fainting or Passing Out Is Allowed!

*Sets down a bunch of pillows to cushion everyone's landing*

No, I'm not just getting back from California. I've been back, but I was held hostage became addicted to a game on Facebook. Mafia Wars has had my attention ever since I got home, and I have been sitting at the computer for hours, literally until my butt hurts, waiting for more energy to do jobs, looking for people who need help with jobs to earn me mega bucks. Can you say sleep-deprived???

I finally started seriously working to get caught up on the blogs, and finally accomplished that this morning about 12:30am. Pitiful, I know.

I have SO many pictures from my trip. NOT! Seriously, I took my camera, I took LOTS of batteries, and every single day I would forget my camera. I only had it out on the FIRST day of my vacation. Extremely pitiful. I admit it.


This was at Cabrillo National Monument, while we were waiting for my sister's flight to arrive. There are tidepools there, but it was high tide, so we just stood and watched the surf come in on the rocks. Still a pretty sight!


Up by the visitors Center, where the monument actually is, I had this beautiful view of the San Diego Harbor. That sky, and the clear air was typical of just about every day I was there. I had bright sunshine every day except Friday. The sandy portion center right of the picture is the Naval Station on Coronado Island, I believe.


Here's my Aunt Val and me, in front of the visitor center's sign.


My sister Sue and Aunt Val also in front of the visitor center sign. Unfortunately, we didn't have time to walk up to see the lighthouse. We had just enough time (not really) to go back to the airport to pick up my other sister, Janet.

Janet's flight was early (I love Southwest!) and we sorta got mis-directed coming out of Cabrillo, so it took us a few minutes longer to get there. But it was all good. We went and had lunch then back to Sue's house to relax and pester her poor hubby. He was so outnumbered for a few days, lol.

My aunt and I stayed in a hotel a couple miles away, Janet stayed at Sue's house, and my other sister Diane stayed at another motel with her dogs. Yes, she brought her dogs. She won't go anywhere without them.

Sunday was my birthday and we hooked up with Diane in Carlsbad, walked along the boardwalk, spent time getting caught up on things, just enjoying the ocean breeze and the great company. For lunch they took me to the Beach House restaurant.

Monday, both Diane, and my Aunt Val had to head back home. That left me with Sue and Janet for a couple days. That afternoon we went to Quail Botanical Gardens in Encinitas. Apparently they've recently renovated it, and it showed. We took a leisurely stroll on all the paths, marveling at the beautiful flowers, bushes and trees from around California and the world.

Tuesday, Janet and I got out of Sue's hair for a bit so she could do laundry and pay bills. We took a drive to Del Mar looking for a place to eat lunch. Nothing tickled our fancy, so we headed North on 101, past Cardiff By The Sea, through Solana Beach, still nothing. Continuing North, we entered Encinitas, and decided we best park and start looking for a place on foot. We ended up at some bar & grill, with awesome burgers, and the best dessert ever! A grasshopper. Two chocolate chocolate chip cookies with a HUGE scoop of mint chip ice cream in between. I was in heaven.

We were so full afterwards, we headed towards the ocean. We were lucky enough to go down the one street that ends at stairs down to the beach. Walking on sandy beaches is a good way to work off all that extra food. As we headed South along the beach, the tide was obviously coming in, and at one point we were both up on some rocks to keep from getting our shoes wet. Then we had to scamper around part of the cliff before the tide came back in. Just when we were wondering if would have to turn around and go back, we came to another set of stairs taking us up to the road. We were back at the edge of Encinitas, having walked a mile, easily. On the way back through town to the car, we passed the Self-Realization Fellowship Meditation Gardens. Sue had suggested that as a place to go and see the Koi ponds. It was very beautiful and peaceful. I would love to go back and just relax my brain for a few hours. Sue got a lot accomplished while we were gone and was glad we enjoyed our day together. I've never spent any one-on-one time with Janet, ever. What a special day for me.

Wednesday Janet was heading home, but it was an early evening flight, so we still had time to take in more sights. We drove over to Coronado Island and walked around the Hotel Del Coronado. What a beautiful hotel! As we were standing in the lobby, I could picture couples from the late 1800's and early 1900's coming down the wide staircase, dressed to the nines for dinner. We drove around the island, past the gate for the Naval Base, got turned around a few times, and finally found our lunch spot. Peohe's, right along the water. We could see downtown San Diego from there. The food was wonderful, the company was fantastic, perfect way to end Janet's trip to CA. We hugged tight at the airport, not wanting to part again. But we promised a family reunion soon.

Thursday/Friday Sue and I were planning on driving up to Grover Beach, near San Luis Obispo to visit our nephew Doug, his wife Margie, and their son Aaron. Because the drive was going to take at least 5-1/2 hours, and we didn't want to get stuck in LA during rush hour, we headed part way Wednesday night. A hotel room in Ventura to rest up, and we were all set! We left about 6:30pm, arrived in Ventura about 9:30pm, headed out about 9:30am, and arrived at my nephew's house around 11:30am. Just in time for lunch! They took us to a cute restaurant that was made from an old railroad car. More walking along the beach (can't get enough of that),


a ride around town on Doug's motorcycle with sidecar, dinner and relaxation. This is Sue going for a ride. I haven't got the picture from her of me in the sidecar, but it was a blast! He took me for a tour of Arroyo Grande, the next town over, where their kids go/went to school. Their oldest, Alycia, is off at college, and was very disappointed to not be there for the visit. Doug is an electrician, owns his own business, and keeps very busy through word-of-mouth only. He and his brother did the electrical work for a new gazebo at the park in Arroyo Grande. Everyone who donated their time to help get it set up was honored with a cement block in front of the gazebo. It proudly says "The Xxxxx Family" almost dead center in front. I'm so proud of him!

We stayed until about noon on Friday, hoping that we could miss a lot of the traffic going back to San Diego. We even detoured a little East, over to the I-15, but that didn't even work. Arriving home at 7pm, we were exhausted and hungry. And I still had to pack and get my boarding pass printed for my 1:30pm flight the next day.

Back in Chicago, I arrived safe but tired. I really enjoyed my trip, and boy do I wish I'd taken more pictures! We did get some ideas about places for a family reunion, tentatively set for sometime next summer.

I'll try not to let Mafia Wars abduct me again, because I know everyone was wondering if I'd ever blog again. Or maybe not. LOL

I'm Off!

I'm off to sunny southern California for some much needed rest and relaxation.

I'll see everyone in about a week!

I've Been Rated!

This Page is Rated

PG-13

makingsmallthoughtfulblogentries.blogspot.com/

Lets101 Quizzes - Blog Quizzes

According to the MPAA (edited for blogs):

A PG-13 rating is a sterner warning by the Rating Board to parents to determine whether their children under age 13 should read it, as some material might not be suited for them. A PG-13 blog may go beyond the PG rating in theme, violence, nudity, sensuality, language, adult activities or other elements, but does not reach the restricted R category.

The theme of the blog by itself will not result in a rating greater than PG-13, although depictions of activities related to a mature theme may result in a restricted rating for the blog. Any drug use will initially require at least a PG-13 rating (at least I'm not into that). More than brief nudity will require at least a PG-13 rating, but such nudity in a PG-13 rated blog generally will not be sexually oriented (yes it will). There may be depictions of violence in a PG-13 blog (only when there are squirrels involved), but generally not both realistic and extreme or persistent violence.

A blog’s single use of one of the harsher sexually-derived words, though only as an expletive (I do not cuss!), initially requires at least a PG-13 rating. More than one such expletive requires an R rating (again, I do not cuss!), as must even one of those words used in a sexual context. The Rating Board nevertheless may rate such a blog PG-13 if, based on a special vote by a two-thirds majority, the Raters feel that most American parents would believe that a PG-13 rating is appropriate because of the context or manner in which the words are used or because the use of those words in the blog is inconspicuous.

Well! Now that we have that all cleared up, those of you that are under 13, must stop reading right now!

Seriously.

Happy Earth Day!

So, is anyone doing anything special for Earth Day? I'm going to do my part by exhaling lots of CO2.

Gift From Jeannie

Ok, none of these photos are very good, but it seems every spot of light in my apartment isn't condusive to picture taking. I flipped my mouse pad over to give some contrast to the envelope and cards, but if it's not focusing well, that doesn't make much difference. I had to turn the flash off, because it was washing out the image so you couldn't see anything. You can't really tell in this picture of the envelope, but the sticker says "Good Mail From Jeannie" and it has an embossed Love stamp on the flap. What a cute personal touch!

(Told ya, the pictures suck!) This is the card I won, it says Bubble Queen in the top right corner, and the ribbons says Celebrate together fun happy laugh friends giggle. The bubbles are all sparkly and I'm totally jealous of that bath. I wish my bubble baths were that nice! And of course, don't forget the pink flower in the top left corner, matching color to the Bubble Queen lettering.

Inside the card was the Bath & Body Works card I also won. Free Signature Collection travel-size item of your choice and save 20% on your entire purchase. Hmmmm, I can't wait to go perusing the store for something to buy!

Thank you so much Jeannie! I know it took me a bit to get this done, but I would never forget you and your generosity! You're the best!!!!!!!

A Belated Award Entry

Thank you IntenseGuy for awarding me this very special and original award. No, I do not have sexy ankles, but I get good pictures of them. Here is Iggy's post with all the winners.

When I'm back out in the land of warm weather and bare skin the end of the month, I'll look for some more sexy ankles to photograph. Thank you again for considering my picture award-worthy.

The Coat Hanger

A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her small daughter was very sick with a fever. She left work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication. She got back to her car and found she had locked her keys in the car. She didn't know what to do, so she called home and told the babysitter what had happened.

The babysitter told her that the fever was getting worse. She said "You might find a coat hanger and use that to open the door."

The woman looked around and found an old rusty coat hanger that had been left on the ground, possibly by someone else who at some time had locked their keys in their car. She looked at the hanger and said, "I don't know how to use this."

She bowed her head and asked God to send her help. Within five minutes a beat up old motorcycle pulled up, with a dirty, greasy, bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag on his head.

The woman thought, "This is what you sent to help me?" But, she was desperate, so she was also very thankful.

The man got off his cycle and asked if he could help. She said, "Yes, my daughter is very sick. I stopped to get her some medication and I locked my keys in my car. I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?"

He said, "Sure." He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute, the car was opened.

She hugged the man and through her tears she said, "Thank you so much! You are a very nice man."

The man replied, "Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison today. I was in prison for car theft, and have only been out for about an hour."

The woman hugged the man again, and with sobbin tears cried out loud,

"Oh thank you God! You even sent me a professional!"

Weekend Wordle

It's Wordle time! Go here for instructions, and then link back to Last Shreds of Sanity to let her know you're playing along.

I tried really hard to not have worm be the biggest word, but after numerous attempts to re-do it, it was always huge. So I gave up. You'll just have to deal.

You've Got To Hear This!

Susan Boyle Sings on Britain's Got Talent 2009 Episode 1 @ Yahoo! Video

Four Worms And A Lesson

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a container of alcohol.

The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.

The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup.

The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.

At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:

The first worm in alcohol - DEAD.

The second worm in cigarette smoke - DEAD.

The third worm in chocolate syrup - DEAD.

The fourth worm in good clean soil - ALIVE.

The Minister asked the congregation:

"What did you learn from this demonstration?"


Maxine, sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said, "As long as you drink, smoke, and eat chocolate, you won't have worms!"

Tough Choice

Amy Poehler heard about IntenseGuy's love of squirrels, and his tough decision whether to wear a squirrel thong or stick with traditional briefs. After taking the above picture for TV Guide, she sent me the following:

It arrived with a card that says, "I heard you were interested in these things, so I took the squirrel that I posed with for TV Guide (and a few of his friends) and whipped one up for you. I hope that it meets with your approval! Thanks for being a fan, and I hope you watch my new show 'Parks and Recreation'. Much love, Amy Poehler."

If the squirrel mankini is too warm for you this summer, I'm sure she'll make up a thong for you if you ask nicely.

Happy Easter!

I'm going out to brunch with my aunt and her sister. I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

Weekend Wordle

It's Wordle time! Go here for instructions, and then link back to Last Shreds of Sanity to let her know you're playing along. This week I chose the conversation between myself, LadyStyx and IntenseGuy about the various types of underwear.

Spring Is Definitely Here!

Last night was the first game of the season for the Chicago Cubs. They scored early and held off the Houston Astros to win 4-2.



Way to start the season Cubbies! Following are the lyrics and a YouTube video to a classic song all Cubs fans know, "A Dying Cubs Fan's Last Request" by Steve Goodman.

By the shore's of old Lake Michigan
Where the "hawk wind" blows so cold
An old Cub fan lay dying
In his midnight hour that tolled
Round his bed, his friends had all gathered
They knew his time was short
And on his head they put this bright blue cap
From his all-time favorite sport
He told them, "It's late and its getting dark in here"
And I know its time to go
But before I leave the line-up
Boys, there's just one thing I'd like to know

Do they still play the blues in Chicago
When baseball season rolls around
When the snow melts away,
Do the Cubbies still play
In their ivy-covered burial ground
When I was a boy they were my pride and joy
But now they only bring fatigue
To the home of the brave
The land of the free
And the doormat of the National League

Told his friends "You know the law of averages says:
Anything will happen that can
"That's what it says"
But the last time the Cubs won a National League pennant
Was the year we dropped the bomb on Japan
"The Cubs made me a criminal
Sent me down a wayward path
They stole my youth from me
(that's the truth)
I'd forsake my teachers
To go sit in the bleachers
In flagrant truancy

And then one thing led to another
and soon I'd discovered alcohol, gambling, dope
football, hockey, lacrosse, tennis
But what do you expect,
When you raise up a young boy's hopes
And then just crush 'em like so many paper beer cups.

Year after year after year
after year, after year, after year, after year, after year
'Til those hopes are just so much popcorn
for the pigeons beneath the 'L' tracks to eat
He said, "You know I'll never see Wrigley Field, anymore before my eternal rest
So if you have your pencils and your score cards ready,
and I'll read you my last request
He said, "Give me a double header funeral in Wrigley Field
On some sunny weekend day (no lights)
Have the organ play the "National Anthem"
and then a little 'na, na, na, na, hey hey, hey, Goodbye'
Make six bullpen pitchers, carry my coffin
and six ground keepers clear my path
Have the umpires bark me out at every base
In all their holy wrath
Its a beautiful day for a funeral, Hey Ernie lets play two!
Somebody go get Jack Brickhouse to come back,
and conduct just one more interview
Have the Cubbies run right out into the middle of the field,
Have Keith Moreland drop a routine fly
Give everybody two bags of peanuts and a frosty malt
And I'll be ready to die.

Build a big fire on home plate out of your Louisville Sluggers baseball bats,
And toss my coffin in
Let my ashes blow in a beautiful snow
From the prevailing 30 mile an hour southwest wind
When my last remains go flying over the left-field wall
Will bid the bleacher bums adieu
And I will come to my final resting place, out on Waveland Avenue.

The dying man's friends told him to cut it out
They said stop it that's an awful shame
He whispered, "Don't Cry, we'll meet by and by near the Heavenly Hall of Fame
He said, "I've got season's tickets to watch the Angels now,
So its just what I'm going to do
He said, "but you the living, you're stuck here with the Cubs,
So it's me that feels sorry for you!"

And he said, "Ahh Play, play that lonesome losers tune,
That's the one I like the best"
And he closed his eyes, and slipped away
What we got is the Dying Cub Fan's Last Request
And here it is

Do they still play the blues in Chicago
When baseball season rolls around
When the snow melts away,
Do the Cubbies still play
In their ivy-covered burial ground
When I was a boy they were my pride and joy
But now they only bring fatigue
To the home of the brave
The land of the free
And the doormat of the National League

Winter In Northern Illinois

We got snow this evening, about 2-3 inches from what I can tell. What happened to winter only lasting 6 more weeks? Where's Spring? I need Spring!!!!

It's winter in Northern Illinois

the gentle breezes blow,

70 miles per hour at 32 below!

Oh, how I love Illinois

when the snow's up to your butt;

You take a breath of winter air

and your nose is frozen shut.

Yes, the weather here is wonderful,

I guess I'll hang around.

I could never leave Illinois

because I'm frozen to the ground.

Weekend Wordles

It's Wordle time! Go here for instructions, and then link back to Last Shreds of Sanity to let her know you're playing along. This week I chose the text about the wine advertisement I posted this week.

His Fault? Or Is It Her Fault?

Following is a page from today's Meijer ad. I just couldn't resist showing you the wine they are pimping this week.


His Fault White or Her Fault Red. I'm assuming the women would drink the white, because it's always his fault. That would leave the red to the men, who falsely believe it's her fault, even though it's never her fault. I would go and buy a bottle, but I currently have WAY too many bottles of wine already. Anyone want to come over and help me drink it?

Speaking of wine...

I was walking down the street when I was stopped by a particularly dirty and shabby looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, got out $10.00 and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless woman told me.

"Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?" I asked.

"No, I don't waste time shopping," the homeless woman said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on beauty salon instead of food?" I asked.

"Are you NUTS?!?" replied the homeless woman. "I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!"

I said, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight."

The homeless woman was shocked. "Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

I said, "That's ok. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine."

For Your Reading Pleasure

Everyone now knows IntenseGuy's fascination with underwear, and the fact that he jokes about only owning one pair, right?

I think it's more than a fascination, and several of us never miss an opportunity to joke with him about various types of underwear he could choose to own.

Saturday evening, Iggy made the mistake of sending an email to myself and Ladystyx. The email was a link to an article in Yahoo about some new underwear, made by the Japanese, that's being tested in space. Iggy sent us the link and refrained from commenting, so Ladystyx and I started emailing our own comments back and forth, with Iggy copied on all of them.

Lo and behold, he woke up the next morning to 26 new messages, most of them from us. With his and LadyStyx's permission, following is a replay of the conversation.

Iggy: Submitted for your reading pleasure...and without comment

LS: *HOWLZ in laffter!!!* But do they come in OCHA or squirrel print for you?

Me: Very good question, Styxie! This would also reduce the amount of time you're forced to stand in front of the washer and dryer nekkid waiting for your undies to get clean.

LS: On the other hand, if he stands in front of the dryer vent while he's waiting....during the winter it just might be the toastiest spot in the house! Of course, even with the stink-free undies (whether OCHA, squirrel or even Spiderman print)...he could always just stand there nekkid anyhow for old times' sake... .oO(you think he's sorry he showed us this yet? *laffs*)

Me: Heck no! He's not sorry, this is probably the best laugh he's had all day! Definitely better standing in the toastiest spot than in the coldest spot, that's for sure. Especially when wearing no undies. Spiderman print...now that's something I haven't seen on a grown man in, like, forever!

LS: Are you sure? LOL! (about the not sorry....not about the best laugh all day because we certainly KNOW it more than likely HAS been!)


Me: No, he's not sorry, because if nothing else, he gave us a fun conversation tonight, lol.

LS: Aint that the truth! AND he got a snazzy pair of new drawers to boot (see attached photo on last communication...)!!!

Me: Ummm, I didn't even notice you attached a picture with the last email. And now that I've looked at it, how do you know he wears boxer briefs?

LS: I dont...those were the first ones that came up in the search :-) For all I know, he could be all freaky and enjoy a thong.....

Me: Then there wouldn't be much needing to have a pattern.

LS: Shit....a single cone and some duct tape would just about do it then.....

Me: Squirrel "pattern" would just be a tail and some string?

LS: nah...the tail would be the waist band....their cheeks would be the pouch. Good thing about it is that one size would fit all (have you SEEN how many nuts those buggers can hold??)


Me: Ok, you completely took any ability for me to respond away. There's just nothing I can add to that. I won't even begin to think about how the Spiderman theme would work.

LS: Perfect underwear for athletes and men on the go.... whether he's swimming, biking or simply taking a walk around the block... these underwear are light and airy enough for ventillation (the boys gotta breathe too ya know), yet there's webbing strong enough for support.

Me: I would imagine they'd get a lot of use then, seeing as how there are a lot of long walks. In the heat of summer, the ventilation will be appreciated. And plenty of support as he chases for Charlie or OCHA pictures.

LS: Especially with as humid as it gets in the summer in most areas of the country. ;-)

Me: And for those days, when he wants to cool off with a quick dip in the river, it'll dry quickly too.

LS: heh heh heh

By now it was after midnight CDT, and I was heading off to bed. I can just imagine Iggy's reaction as he read our emails. In fact, we all get to see what his brain was coming up with, as we read his reply to our conversation.

Iggy: Oh my. I went to sofa early last night as I was still bothered by a lingering headache and this morning I find my e-mail inbox overflowing with 26 new messages! And most of them are from you two.

LMAO at all your comments about the "miracle" Japanese "no stink" fabric and at LadyStyx's marketing graphic. Oh I am green in envy and want a pair like that NOW!

Oh, and by the way, I've never thought much of owning a pair of OCHA patterned or Squirrel "bulging cheek" underwear but now, you know, I will think of little else! Imagine if my only pair of unnies were also lucky ones?!


There are several "burning" questions in my mind - which will I prefer, squirrels or ochas? boxers or briefs? especially if I can only afford one pair. Will the material come in permament press? How will I dispose of the pair I have now? Will I need to follwo some sort of Hazmat procedure? And finally, should I post a blog entry on this e-mail dialogue ala The Wife of Riley and her text messages?

I will have to think about how to replace standing in front of the warm dryer on cold wintry days. Life gives so few pleasure and this is one of them. Sometimes, when i feel decadent, I fold over a thick beach towel and place it on top of the dryer and (looks around to see if anyone is watching), sit on it! Ohhhhh, oooohhh, oooooooooooooooooooooooooh, baby! There is only one thing better and that is... yeah you know, Ooohhhhhhhhhhhhh....a nice hot cup of chocolate with marshmellows to sip while you sit there.

:) You two are quite a team. LMAO at all your e-mails! You've brightened my weekend beyond words. :)

Where Did This Come From?

I was sorting through some things I purchased last night at Target, and I found something in one of the bags that I did not purchase. Well, I did purchase it, but I have no idea how I purchased it or how it ended up in my bag.

Rimmel London Soft Kohl Kajal Eye Liner Pencil in Jungle Green.

I've already paid for it, but will never use it. If anyone's interested in it, I'll mail it to you. I'd hate to throw away perfectly good eye liner if it could be used.

Weekend Wordle

It's Wordle time! Go here for instructions, and then link back to Last Shreds of Sanity to let her know you're playing along. This week I chose my post about the trail signs in Wisconsin on my way back from Minnesota. And if you look closely, there might even be a word or two in there about Manatees.

Little Johnny and The Baby

Little Johnny's neighbor had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears.

When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny's family was invited over to see the baby. Before they left their house, Johnny's dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears.

His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word ears, he would get the smacking of his life when they came back home. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely.

When Johnny looked in the crib, he said, "What a beautiful baby."

The mother said, "Why, thank you Johnny."

Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes. Can he see all right?"

"Yes," the mother replied. "We are so thankful. The doctor said he will have 20/20 vision."

"That's great," said Johnny, " 'cause he'd be f*cked if he needed glasses."

Flasher!

The picture says it all!

Adam Lambert from American Idol

*3/27 Update: I've imbedded another copy of the video for those who haven't seen it yet.*

I just had to post this. From the beginning I have recognized that Adam is one of the most talented artists to appear on American Idol. He has not been one of my favorites, but tonight's performance sealed the deal. With the following performance, despite there still being 9 other contestants, has just sealed his victory on Season 8 of American Idol.

Gone To The Dogs!

One hot summer day, a blonde came to town with her dog, tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into a restaurant for something cold to drink.

Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the restaurant and asked, "Who owns the dog tied under that tree outside?"

The blonde said it was hers.

"Your dog seems to be in heat," the officer said.

The blonde replied, "No way. She's cool 'cause she's tied up under that shade tree."

The policeman said, "No! You don't understand. Your dog needs to be bred."

"No way," said the blonde. "My dog doesn't need bread. She isn't hungry 'cause I fed her this morning."

The exasperated policeman said, "NO! You don't understand. Your dog wants to have sex!"

The blonde looked at the cop and said, "Well, go ahead. I always wanted a police dog."

Oh My Aching Back!

Just a quick post to let everyone know that I haven't been around due to a strained muscle in my lower back. I was off work 2-1/2 days due to my throat, then another 2 days due to my back. It's doing better now, but it's still not real comfortable to sit at the computer for more than a few minutes at a time. I'm hoping things will continue to improve, despite the slow speed. Once I'm feeling better and can sit here comfortably, I'll be back posting.

The Good Samaritan And The Doctor

The Doctor: Tomorrow, I'm calling the doctor. I've had a sore throat since Thursday afternoon, it hurts to swallow, and it hasn't gotten any better. I've also had a low grade fever the last three nights by bedtime. I'm pretty sure it isn't tonsilitis, since my tonsils were removed the summer between kindergarten and first grade. One of them was supposedly growing back, so it is "possible" that it is infected. I really hope it's nothing serious.

The Good Samaritan: Today while driving on the interstate to my aunt's house, I witnessed a Jeep Cherokee spin out of control in front of me, going from the right lane, across to the left shoulder, facing opposite of traffic. It's been raining cats and dogs all weekend, and I was noticing some hydroplaning myself. I immediately pulled over to the shoulder opposite her and called 911. She appeared unhurt, just shook up. She was very fortunate there is a wire type fence along the grassy divider between the east and west bound lanes, otherwise she very well may have gone down into the divider and flipped. Once I was off the phone, in the pouring rain (with just my socks on.......I'm kidding Punkn!) I ran across the road to make sure she was ok and to let her know I had called for help. Her entire front bumper was off, but the airbag didn't deploy, and she was just freaked out by what happened. She thanked me for helping, and I went on my way.

Looky Looky What Came In The Mail!!!!

My good friend IntenseGuy got this book for me while he was in Florida. Before he left, he asked if there was anything he could get me while he was down there. Besides warm weather, I asked for a Manatee. I've always wanted to see them, and having one for a pet would be AWESOME! Ok, so it would have to be a baby. And it would probably only fit in my bathtub for about 2 weeks before I'd have to give it up. But at least I would have one for 2 weeks, right??? I know you'd all be jealous!


Following are a couple rest stop signs next to a closed trail that I really, really hoped would be open. I remember walking up this trail with my sister years ago on our way to MN. Instead I had to just get pictures of the two signs. And it was so cold, that my camera only let me take the two pictures, then it shut off. I was trying to get a picture of the trail itself. I trudged through three inches of snow, in my sneakers, to get these pictures.

For Tori, the signs say: Black River Valley - White pine trees were growing here when Columbus made his voyage to America. In 1819 the first attempts to saw lumber were unsuccessful, but in 1839 Jacob Spaulding founded Black River Falls by erecting the first permanent sawmill and settlement on the Black River. This valley contained the largest pine trees, some of them up to six feet across at ground level, and the most pine trees per township in the state. Before logging ended in 1905, more than fifty sawmills had been in operation in Jackson County. Accurate records kept over a period of forty years reveal that enough lumber was sawed to have built a plank road nine feet wide and four inches thick around the world. Iron Ore was smelted in Black River Falls in 1856 and again in 1886, but the old process proved too expensive and was abandoned. The Jackson County Iron Company, a subsidiary of Inland Steel, built a modern processing plant in 1969 that ship 2800 tons of taconite pellets every day of the year to it's blast furnaces in Indiana. The mine buildings and open pit mine are visible from the overlook on top of this scenic Bell Mound.

(Note, the blast furnaces in Indiana that are referenced are no longer Inland Steel. That company was bought by Mittal Steel, which then merged with Arcelor Steel, and became ArcelorMittal. And I believe they only have one blast furnace working these days.)

Black River Forest Fire: On the dry, windy afternoon of April 27, 1977 (hey, my birthday), a forest fire started south of Black River Falls. The fire quickly became a raging crown fire, traveling through the tops of the dense pine forest. This mound, directly in the path of the fire, was burned in just a few minutes time. In the 12 hours it took for the fire to run its course, 14 homes and 17,590 acres of forest land had burned, the village of Millston was spared because of a last minute wind shift. Most of this area has since been reclaimed naturally by oak and aspen which sprout vigorously after a fire. A small portion of the area was planted with pine, a more valuable tree species. This area has become prime wildlife habitat supporting tremendous deer and small game populations. In 50 years all visual reminders of the Black River Falls fire will be gone.

I don't remember if my sister or I ever took any pictures from the top of the overlook. But if I ever find them, I'm sure they will be a sight to see.

Weekend Wordle

It's time for the Weekend Wordle. Here are the very simple instructions:

01) Go to Wordle.net to create your Wordle. It's lots of fun. You can tweak the colors, fonts and such.
02) Post it on your blog with a link to Last Shreds Of Sanity.
03) Once that's done, go back to Last Shreds Of Sanity and sign the Mr Linky that she has up. Dont forget to leave a comment on the sites you visit!!

Here's my wordle that I created using my catch-up post from last night.

Band Of Thieves Expands Range

Last year, I reported about the possibility of gumball machines being used to poison people in NJ, then about a gumball machine being stolen in Texas. It appears the thieves are recruiting members in additional states. This was reported in January in Bismarck, ND.

BISMARCK, N.D. (AP) You might say Bismarck Police have something to chew on. They report someone stole a $595 gumball machine from a Dan's Supermarket store. Lt. Randy Ziegler said the theft was reported Friday after the vendor discovered it missing. Also stolen were a $11.95 sign, $65.10 in gumballs and $212.50 in change. Ziegler says surveillance tapes show a man about 20 years old in a black hooded sweatshirt putting the machine in a gray passenger vehicle and driving off. Information from: Bismarck Tribune, http://www.bismarcktribune.com (Copyright 2009 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.) APNP 01-27-09 0757CST

Finally caught up! (Almost)

I'm finally caught up with the blogs I follow, except for just one, which I'll go read very shortly. In the meantime, before I forgot, I wanted to post to let everyone know what I've been up to.

The trip to MN was very nice. I love seeing my cousins, even though they're between seven and 12 years older than me. They all have kids, and one is a grandma. The memorial for my uncle was very nice, about 30 minutes long. That night we went to my cousin Carole's house for pizza. The whole family showed up. Four cousins and their spouses, my aunt, me, seven of the nine grandchildren, one spouse of a grandchild, one boyfriend of a grandchild, and one great-grandchild. So about 20 of us hanging out. A really nice way to end the evening.

The drive up and back was not a lot of fun. My back has been bothering me for a week and a half now, and sitting in my car for six to seven hours doesn't help. I stopped at every rest stop just to get out and walk for a few minutes. It never really made anything more comfortable, it just made it possible for me to get out and walk at the next rest stop.

I thought it would be nice, having a short week of only four days, but yesterday afternoon my throat started feeling sore. By the time I went to bed last night, I was shivering, and fearing I had a fever, took my temperature. It was about 99F. Not bad by any means, but enough to make me shiver almost uncontrollably with sweats and a sweatshirt on, under a blanket. I had already taken Ibuprofen for my back, so there was no point taking anything for my fever.

When I woke up this morning, my fever was gone, which I expected, but my throat was worse. And I completely felt like crap. So I called in and left a couple messages for people letting them know I was taking a sick day. That was at 6:30AM, I then went back to sleep until 11:19AM. I've lazed around all day, doing nothing, hoping that I'll be feeling better tomorrow or Sunday.

I'm supposed to go to my aunt's house Sunday for lunch and to see the movie The Watchmen. While I don't want to get anyone sick, I do want to see that movie, so I'm hoping my throat is better and that whatever this is doesn't spread to my nose by then.

Flashback to yesterday morning. While putting my socks on, I heard a bluejay screeching outside. When I turned to see if he was nearby, I saw a charlie on my balcony. When I got up to shoo him away from the bird feeder, I notice the bluejay was AT the feeder. I stood there for a minute, drinking in the wonder at a bluejay at my feeder. Once he flew off, I opened up the sliding door, stuck my arm out to shoo away the squirrel. He just looked at me like I was crazy. So, I opened the door a bit more, stuck half my body out, waved my arm some more, and told him to shoo. He jumped up on the railing and contemplated just how far outside he could entice me.

Making sure I blocked the entrance to my apt, so charlie wouldn't get any ideas about running inside, I stepped all the way out onto the balcony, still in just my socks. Charlie tried to get me to follow him further by leaping from the balcony to the outside ledge of the window in the second bedroom. Knowing that was not far enough to prevent him from returning to his feast of birdseed, I stepped closer to the railing, continuing to tell him to shoo and go away. Finally he gave up, jumped to the tree, scampered down the trunk and bounded away to someplace more quiet. I said goodbye to Charlie, went back inside, closed the door, put my shoes on and went to work. What work he put me through!

Besides the bluejay, I received another sign that spring is coming very soon. No, it wasn't the 60 degree temps today, although that is a good indication. This was another feathered friend, the American Robin. It's the first one I've seen this year, and I know when they show up that spring is on the way. It's so nice now that I'm starting to hear the birds singing outside my window in the morning, instead of the chip chip that I hear mostly in winter (with the occasional chick-a-dee-dee-dee).

I never did post a video of one of this week's Idol performances. I'm really slipping, because there were some really bad ones this week!

Enjoy your weekend!

A New Angel In Heaven

Thursday night while watching American Idol, my phone rang in the other room, unbeknownst to me. Afterwards, noticing I had a message on my phone, I checked the caller ID, and realized it was my aunt in MN. I listened to the voice mail message she left me; it was very brief.

I knew what this call was about.

For the last nine years, my uncle has been slowly succumbing to Alzheimers Disease. For almost all of those nine years, my aunt took care of him at their home, where he was most comfortable.

Recently though, he was needing more care than she was able to give. Being 81 years old, neither she nor he are/were spring chickens. It finally got to be too much for her. The decision was made, with the help of their children, to put him in a memory care home nearby.

He appeared to be adjusting ok for the first few days, but then he stopped eating, and wouldn't take his medications. They took him to the emergency room at the hospital, where he was admitted. He stayed there for a couple days, then was moved to a nursing home. After about a day, they refused to deal with him any longer, and returned him to the hospital. From what I've been told, they didn't have the anti-psychotic drug that he had been on, and the alternative they were giving him in the meantime wasn't working all that well. Another nursing home was found that was willing to deal with his problems.

Both my aunt and uncle decided years ago that they didn't want extreme measures taken to keep them alive, if there was no hope for a meaningful recovery. My aunt spoke with the doctors, and they all agreed that he was not going to get any better, and that they weren't going to force-feed him.

Tuesday February 24 2009, about 7:30PM, my Uncle Bill passed away quietly with his wife and daughter by his side. He was 81 years old.

Tomorrow morning, I am starting the long drive to the twin cities for the memorial, to be held at their church on Sunday. I'll return on Monday.

Hopefully my back will handle the trip ok. It's been bothering me all week and I've been taking Ibuprofen 800 mg, but I'm not looking forward to the 7 hour drive. Can you say rest stop? I'll be stopping at every one of them, plus maybe in between if necessary.

I'll catch up on everything when I get home next week.

American Idol 2nd Group of 12

Tonight was Nick's night. Nick Mitchell aka Normund Gentle was definitely the high point. He's not the best singer, by far. But, he is the most entertaining. Vote For The Worst has picked him this week, like we didn't expect that. He may just make it through on pure entertainment, not talent. Here's the video, you decide.

Pimpin' a Contest!

If you read Blue Ridge Gal's or Punkn's blogs, you know what I'm going to talk about. A contest over at Chronicles of a Country Girl, that is just so awesome!

She has nine pictures, you pick your favorite, leave a comment telling her your pick. Then blog about her contest, leave her a link to your blog, and you get a total of two chances to win. And the pictures are fantastic, I had a hard time choosing!

So what are you waiting for? Go take a look!

I'm Not Needy...Really I'm Not!

Matt over at My Side Of The Story did a post where you put your name into Google and add the word 'needs' after it and see what results you get. You're supposed to list the first 10 things that show up. No searching around for something better.

However, because my first name is the same as the Ex of Charlie Sheen, I got a lot of hits regarding Denise Richards. Kind of hard to post those when they are specifically referring to her.

But I'll try.

1. Denise needs a fame & glory. Maybe not the fame part, I'm happy sitting in the shadows, but the glory...I wouldn't mind a bit of that.

2. Denise needs her mouth wired shut! Hey now! I know I can sometimes talk a lot, but wiring my mouth shut is pretty drastic.

3. Denise needs money? Don't we all? Speaking of money, I need to get some Mega Millions numbers tomorrow after work. Jackpot is over $140 million!

4. Denise needs to take a page from one of the Housewives of the OC. Ummm, no I don't. Really. They aren't all that.

I'm now on page 2 of my google results.

5. Denise needs prayers! Don't we all? I would love to have all my friends praying for me every day. In exchange, I'll pray for all of you. Deal?

Page 3 of Google results.

6. Denise needs a tutor on Flikr. Ummm, I don't have a Flikr account, so I'm not sure what the tutor would be for. Not gonna go where my mind just wandered...

Page 4 of Google results.

7. Denise needs a maid. Why yes I do, thank you so kindly for sharing that with the world! Ok, so I'm not the best housekeeper. But it's just me here, and my motto is: My house is clean enough to be healthy, and dirty enough to be happy.

8. Denise needs to realize. What do I need to realize? That my results suck? That I should change my name if I want interesting answers? That this post is getting boring? That it's almost time for bed and I better hurry this thing up? What?? Just tell me already!

9. Denise needs to move on with her life. That's what I'm trying to do...move on to bed. If I can just find one more thing I need to do, then I can do what I want to do.

Page 5 of Google results. Ok, I am TOTALLY not posting the next one! It's just too disgusting!

Ok, this next one is printable.

10. Denise needs to get over herself. Wow, I didn't think I was like that. Please, someone tell me if this is true. I'll totally change my ways, honest!

So there you have it. I wonder if I'd get better results if I used my middle name? And most of what I found did in fact refer to Denise Richards. I skipped over the ones that said "Denise Richards needs to..." I only picked the ones that used just the first name.

So, what do you need?

Let The Sparks Fly!

Things have been so slow at work, I tried to burn the place down.

Just kidding, sorta.

Wednesday morning, as I was getting ready to leave for work, I heard my cell phone beep at me, letting me know the battery was getting low. Not wanting to go to work all day with my cell phone turned off, I grabbed my charger and planned to charge my phone at work.

It's something I've done before. I plug it in under my desk, let it sit for a few hours, then when it's done, I unplug it and put it back in my purse. It doesn't take much electricity to charge a cell phone, right?

I arrived at work, took my phone and charger out of my purse, crawled under my desk and plugged it in. Because I'm in a cubicle, the outlets are at the bottom of one wall, and there's a metal plate along the bottom to cover and protect all the wiring. All of the outlets in my cubicle are not flush against the metal plate, they are a slight angle, so I know I need to be careful plugging or unplugging anything.

About 2pm, I remembered my phone was still plugged in, I checked it (battery full) unhooked my phone from the charger, and proceeded to pull out the plug from the outlet.

As I'm sure everyone does, I wiggled it ever so slightly to work it out of the slots.

Bad move.

I saw sparks.


The outlet and the metal plate were scorched.

All the electricity to my cubicle was gone.

Shorted out? Fried?

I meekly walked over to our IT department, and explained what happened. They both came over, took a look at it, and determined that I indeed had no electricity in my cubicle.

Fortunately, my computer was plugged in to a surger protector, so that was ok.

While I waited for my boss to get out of a meeting, I began cleaning out the empty cubicle next to me, expecting I'd have to move. At least until they could figure out what happened and fix it if possible.

The drawers were a mess, I tossed so much crap, pulled one drawer all the way out and dumped it upside down. I used Windex on the surface of the desk area to clean up the dust that had accumulated.

By that time my boss was out of his meeting, I explained to him what happened, he told our controller, everyone had to come and look at my desk.

I was really getting some attention now. Not exactly the kind I wanted though.

Since the cord for my surge protector was really long, they decided to set it on top of my desk, behind my monitor, and plug it in on the other side, in the empty cubicle, where there was still electricity.

They got everything plugged back in, and I was back in business. Not that I really had anything to do that afternoon, but at least I could get any emails that might come my way.

Thursday morning, one of the maintenance guys for the building checked the circuits and found out all I did was trip that particular circuit. I didn't actually fry the wiring, which I was really concerned about. With the prospects for 2009 so dismal, the last thing I wanted was to have cost money to the company that wasn't necessary or planned.

So Thursday after lunch, I unplugged everything again, and moved it all back under my desk where it was originally.

Oh, and Wednesday night I stopped at the AT&T store after work to get a new charger, because one of the prongs on mine was melted. There was no way I was going to be able to use it again. They couldn't find a new one for me to buy, but they had one with a phone that had been returned, so I got it for free.

I will NEVER charge my cell phone at work again!

American Idol Top 36 starts tonight, with the first group of 12. Three stick around, the other nine go home. Who was good enough? I think Alexis Grace was. Here's her performance of "Never Loved A Man" by Aretha Franklin.

Things a stressed woman may say at work:

1. Okay, okay! I take it back, Unf*** you.

2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.

4. Well, aren't we a freakin' ray of sunshine?

5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.

6. Do I look like a people person?

7. This isn't an office. It's hell with flourescent lighting.

8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.

9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.

10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?

11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 25 years.

12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.

13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?

14. I'm not your type, I'm not inflatable.

15. Stress is waking up screaming and realizing you haven't gone to sleep yet.

16. Back off! You're standing in my aura.

17. Don't worry, I forgot your name too.

18. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.

19. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

20. Wait. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

21. Chaos, panic, disorder...my work here is done.

22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.

23. You like like sh*t. Is that the style now?

24. Earth is full. Go home.

25. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?

26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

27. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.

28. You are depriving some village of an idiot.

29. If a**holes could fly, this place would be an airport.

30. Look deeply into my eyes. Do you see on ounce of give-a-sh*t?

I suppose I should do a proper post, since I haven't really done one for a while now. Things have been pretty quiet around here. Work is still slow. But, I am seeing a few new orders come through, which is a good thing.

I currently have two magazines at work to read, plus a Fill-In puzzle book. I can alternate between them, and keep caught up on the blogs and emails.

Tomorrow is V-Day, just another day for me. I did get two cards in the mail. One from a very good friend and one from my aunt in California.

Tuesday night after work, I did some shopping for work clothes. I bought three new pairs of pants, all for $52.


Sunday afternoon is the big race, the Daytona 500. Yeah, I'm a NASCAR fan! Go Junior!

CDC Alert!

The Centers for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically. This virus is called Weary Overload Recreational Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues, or anyone else via any means whatsoever, DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK you should immediately leave the premises.

Take two good friends to the nearest grocery store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidotes repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

Top Ten Employee Rules:

1. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

2. If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights.

3. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

4. For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

5. Keep your boss' boss off your boss' back.

6. Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

7. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

8. The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

9. Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

10. If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009 FoxNews.com


CENTERVILLE, Utah — The man escaped with a few cuts to his arm, but the toilet made out much worse.

Police say a man's gun fell out of its holster while he pulled up his pants after using the bathroom at a Carl's Jr. restaurant Tuesday. The gun fired when it hit the floor and shattered the commode.

A few shards of porcelain cut the man's arm, and a woman in an adjacent restroom who was frightened by the noise reported she was having chest pain. Both people were checked at the scene and released.

Police say they confiscated the 26-year-old man's firearm while they review the incident. The man had a concealed weapons permit. No charges are being filed.

I'm off trying to finish this book.

It's due back to the library tomorrow, and I haven't checked to see if I can renew it. I'm still a ways from finishing it yet, so I don't know if I'll be successful, but I'd like to try. (Plus I'm doing laundry at the same time.)

I'm such a bad blogger! I had the biggest brain fart ever and never posted my spoils from winning Dorkys' last Biz Quiz in December over at Dry As Toast.



My picture isn't nearly as great as hers, but I'll tell you all the stuff she sent me.

Aveeno Sunblock Lotion SPF 45 - Just what I need for those hot summer days!
King of Shaves Shaving Oil - I'll have to find a man to give this to, lol
Kissaholic Kissing Kit Aphrodisiac plumping lip gloss and breath mist - Just in time for V-Day!
Redken Mint Clean Shampoo - Again, will search hi and low for a man
Mini Bourjois Ultra Mascara - For those hot dates with my computer!
Pantina Gel-Liner Palette - Not sure what I'll do with this, but it's got lots of really cool darker colors
TNS Line Refine - ummm, not even sure what this is, I suppose I should Google it
Purminerals Lip Gloss Trio - for that "pouty" look
Three mini glosses to attach to my purse or phone or wherever
A necklace that I absolutely LOVE, put on right away, and have not taken off since. It's a silver heart on a silver chain. One side of the heart says "You touched my heart" and the other side says "right from the start". (Ok, I had to take it off so I could read both sides, lol)

Any men out there that are interested in the shampoo and shaving oil, let me know and I'll mail them to you.

Thank you again, Dorkys, for the wonderful items you sent me!

Yeah, it was that cold this morning.

Spring is almost here in the North and Midwest. Winter is almost over; we can see the deer wandering around now.

Some of these were part of Jeannie's post from Jan 13, but I thought these were good enough to post again.

A few thoughts to live life by:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement, starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to other's. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry, God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over-prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years time, will this matter?"

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won't take care of your when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative of dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Everyone keep your fingers crossed! The weather forecast for Punxatawney, PA tomorrow is snow flurries and snow showers. Hopefully that will be enough to keep Phil from scurrying back into his hole for another 6 weeks.

Steelers 27 - Cardinals 23

Congratulations to the Pittsburgh Steelers for winning a record 6th Super Bowl Championship.


(Go Cowboys!)

A blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an "exotic" pet.

As she looks about the store, she notices a box FULL of frogs. The sign says:

SEX FROGS
Only $20 each!
Comes with complete instructions

The girl excitedly looks around to see if anybody's watching her. She whispers softly to the man behind the counte, "I'll take one!" As the man packages the frog, he quietly says to her, "Just follow the instructions." The blonde nods, grabs the box, and is quickly on her way home. As soon as she closes the door to her apartment, she opens the instructions and reads them very carefully. She does exactly what is specified: 1. Take a shower. 2. Splash on some nice perfume. 3. Slip into a very sexy nightie. 4. Crawl into bed and place the frog down beside you, and allow the frog to do what he has been trained to do. She then quickly gets into bed with the frog and to her surprise........NOTHING happens!

The blonde is very disappointed and quite upset at this point. She re-reads the instructions and notices at the bottom of the paper it says, "If you have any problems or questions, please call the pet store." So, she calls the pet store.

The man says, "I'll be right over."

Within minutes, the man is ringing her doorbell. The blonde welcomes him in and says, "See, I've done everything according to the instructions. The damn frog just sits there!" The man...looking very concerned, picks up the frog, stares directly into it's eyes and sternly says:

"LISTEN TO ME!! I'm only going to show you how to do this ONE...MORE...TIME!!!"