Unfortunately, my funny story about trying to get home last night turned out to not be quite as funny as I thought. But since I mentioned it, I'll go ahead and tell you the story anyway. Here's a little background information that will come in handy, not that it will mean much to those who have never been to Chicago.

I work right by O'Hare International Airport. The most direct route to get between home and work is I-88 (runs E/W) and I-294 (runs N/S), both tollways. Because we have two seasons here, winter and construction, both of these roads, in addition to every other road in Chicago, are very busy during rush hour. I also have a couple of alternate routes I could take, but they are a little longer travel time, so I only take them in emergencies. I have set up two traffic reports that I get each afternoon, via email, about 10-15 minutes before I normally leave work. They tell me travel times, average speeds and list any "problem spots" on the two specific roads listed above. That way I know whether I should take an alternate, or just be prepared to sit in traffic.

To yesterday...I got an email at 3:45pm that said there was a car on fire on the shoulder on I-294 about a mile before I would exit off to get to I-88. It sounded pretty bad, and based on the other information, I believed traffic was going to be a nightmare. So I decided on an alternate route home. I checked the two alternate roads I would take to bypass the car fire, and decided traffic was light enough to make it worth my while to do it. That particular alternate was I-90 West (sort of goes in a NW direction), to I-355 South, which then meets up with I-88 a few miles before I would exit off for home. Traffic on I-90 was great, hardly any slow spots. I got onto I-355 South and everything was looking good. However! I got to the one toll booth on I-355 and traffic comes to a dead stop. At first I was thinking it was just backed up because of people who were paying with cash had to merge back in to traffic, and once we got past that we'd get moving again.

Nope. We'd move a couple car lengths, and stop. Then we'd move another car length and stop. This went on and on and on for about a mile. Trying to stay calm, which is hard for me to do, I looked at my clock for the umpteenth time, and realized I could get the traffic report to hopefully find out what the heck was going on. I listened as the traffic reporter went through the various roads, he or she finally got to I-355, and they said there was a car fire on the right side by an exit up ahead of me. I looked to the right, the sign for that exit said it was still 3 miles ahead. THREE MILES? I have to sit through this for 3 miles? But wait, wasn't the car fire supposed to be on I-294? I kept listening. Nothing about a car fire on I-294! Could my emailed traffic report have listed the wrong road for the car fire? Surely not!

All I was thinking about was that I was trying to avoid a traffic jam due to a car fire, and it wasn't even on that other road, and by taking my alternate, I was actually in the middle of the traffic jam. I fully expected to go into work, mention to my co-worker Cathy about the car fire, and she was going to tell me there was no car fire on I-294. THAT was why my story about getting home last night was funny.

That all changed when I went in to work today. I asked Cathy about the traffic on I-294, expecting her to say there was no traffic, and that she "flew" down the road to her grandma's house. Nope. She said the traffic was horrendous. She said there WAS a car on fire on I-294, that it was completely destroyed from what she could see while it was on the wrecker. In addition to that, someone going North on I-294 must have been paying too much attention to the car on fire, and lost control of their vehicle and smashed it into the cement barrier between the North and South lanes. So there was now a second problem on I-294 for everyone to gawk, looky-loo, rubberneck, etc at.

I think I'm glad I took my alternate after all. I only had the one car fire to deal with, not additional idiots crashing into cement barriers. The joys of living in the big city.